so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
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It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
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No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize