just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
You called yourself Captain Aspirin and then tried to cure my headache by shoving pills up my nose. Fuck you becoming a nurse, you can't take care of me while you're drunk ever again. Ever.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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