It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
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