I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
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Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
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All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
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