thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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