Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
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