my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Randomize
