Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Randomize
