I CAN MOONWALK!
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize