We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
Instead of politely asking me to shave, he passive-aggressively left me a groupon for a bikini wax. So I passive-aggresively fucked his roommate. And his roommate didn't mind my bush when he went down on me. Anyway, do you want the groupon or not?
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
Randomize
