Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
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