You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
Randomize
