your thong is hanging out like whoa
I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
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