I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
Randomize
