yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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