we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
it hurts more in the daytime
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
Randomize
