I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
there is puke in my bra ... again
Randomize
