school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
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