Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Randomize
