The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
You smell like a Billy Joel song
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
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