Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
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