Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Randomize
