I didn't shave. On purpose
My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Randomize
