Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
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