I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
so let's talk penis.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Randomize
