So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
