I will die if light touches me.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
