Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
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