Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
My breasts were aching with rage.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
