I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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