I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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