I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
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