ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
