i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
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