He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
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