Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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