Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
Randomize
