New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
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