Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize