I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
Randomize
