So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
