im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
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