if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
only you would photoshop your dick
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
Instead of politely asking me to shave, he passive-aggressively left me a groupon for a bikini wax. So I passive-aggresively fucked his roommate. And his roommate didn't mind my bush when he went down on me. Anyway, do you want the groupon or not?
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
Randomize
