I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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