I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
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