This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
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