I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Randomize
