It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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