so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
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