i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
Randomize
